Girls insulting girls. When we will learn?

This week I overheard some girls saying to each other (very matter-of-factly)
"Yes, I like that dress, but she should have let out the hem because she does not have skinny knees".

Instantly I felt like Cady in Mean Girls during this scene:

Karen: God. My hips are huge! 

Gretchen: Oh please. I hate my calves. 

Regina: At least you guys can wear halters. I've got man shoulders. 

Gretchen: My hairline is so weird. 
Regina: My pores are huge. 
Karen: My nail beds suck. 
Cady: [voiceover] I used to think there was just 'fat' and 'skinny'. But apparently there's lots of things that can be wrong on your body. 


Now call me loony, naive or just plain dumb, but I didn't even know 'skinny knees' or 'fat knees' were something you were even supposed to consider when getting dressed in the morning.
To me, you either have knees or you don't have knees and either way, they really needn't be bothered about. They're knees.

The comment left me feeling very sympathetic towards the girls making the comment (sad creatures) as well as, obviously, feeling sympathetic for the girl who,
Apparently, needed to do some knee crunches STAT...Unless she wanted to be known as Fat-Knee'd Nancy and talked about behind her back.

Now maybe I've never heard this insult because I have knobby 8 year old little boy's knees...So an insult for my knee's would go more like this: "Yeah, great dress but somebody PLEASE get a knife out and shave down some of that bone in her knee's or else put a longer skirt on her".

Or maybe it's just that, like Cady, I didn't go to public schools growing so I was a bit protected from hearing weird and obscure physical feature judgements like "she has fat knees", "her elbows are too pointy", "her butt is lopsided", "her face is on backwards".

Ok maybe that last one is an exaggeration, but to me, saying a girl needs to lengthen her hem because her knees aren't 'skinny' sounds just as ridiculous as "Her face is on backwards".

I grew up out of the public schooling system, yes, but it doesn't mean I'm wholly ignorant of insults.
I've been touring since my early teens so I've definitely seen and heard my own slew of judgements from the attention my family and I have garnered with our band Eisley and there's a very special set hoarded all for me as the wife of one of indie-punk's Darling's. I get crap thrown at me a lot, but
I also get emails and messages every week from young girls and women wanting to know any secrets or tips or magical cures for feeling insecure, dealing with bullies and just being made fun of, period...
I always have the same advice and that's just to remember that what they think is absolutely trivial.
It's ludicrous, ridiculous, meaningless, heartless and bodaciously bonkers.

When you let the total and absolute truth that it stems from the fact that people are broken and hurting so much so that they literally NEED to put others down to make themselves feel less-insecure about who they are then you will, in turn, begin to hurt for them and not over the fact that they said you're a
"smelly, dirty, tit-less b*tch" (oh yeah, that's a real quote).
I mean that crap's nuts!
So don't take it to heart, because you really shouldn't. Because it's empty, it's bollocks and it's lies
(Ok, maybe not the tit-less part, we can't all be a Kardashian right?).

Girls (guys too but I'm feeling girl specific here as I've seen a lot of girl-on-girl insulting lately)...
We seriously need to have grace and stop judging other girls, embrace the things that are unique in each other and see them as the things that make us all beautiful in our own way. I'm guilty of it too! But the truth is there is plenty of room for everyone to be exactly who they are and no one should have to fear being themselves or apologize for it. You want to wear purple from head to toe one day? Freaking go ahead! Um...is there the chance that you will be made fun of? Yep. You know what?...
They can deal with it.

They go home at the end of the day and they're the shallow-ass person who spewed their darkness into the world by making fun of someone who was being an individual (and were threatened by that)...
and you're the person who let your {insert your name here} light shine and in turn, is making the world that much more interesting for the rest of us. So thank you.

To the bullies...I hope that someone in your life encourages you to be yourself and tell you that it's
ok and cutting down others doesn't lift you up...it slams you down into emptiness.
Don't get caught up in it. Just don't.

This message is brought to you by Sherri-Rants-R-Us.
s.